Concerns on Homeschooling In California

Lately I’ve just been sad and angry even more. It started in 7th grade when my older sister (half sister, she lives with her mom) went to rehab for drugs. This was a huge deal, I was a little to young to know what was happening, I was scared because she would do every kind of drug, so I new that I could lose her. She is supposed to be better’ She never calls it’s been 2 years since she left for California. Also during 7th grade I was tremendously bullied by my volleyball team because, quote “I’m ugly, stupid, suck at the sport, loser, freak, weirdo.” I only told my mom about this once, but I didn’t want to talk about it because of what was happening to my sister, I didn’t want them to worry. 8th grade got a lot better i still played volleyball and met my best friend so that year was amazing. 9th grade I wasn’t aloud to go to that school anymore (my parents think its a bad school) so I went to a school were my cousins went. It was very hick-like. I made the JV volleyball team. Every girl except two didn’t like me, (I guess shy is not a good trait) and my brother fell into depression and wanted to go to rehab in Florida…so he did and he lived with us (mom, dad, and me) so it was hard for me. So after half a year there at the hick school, I didn’t feel welcomed and I went to homeschooling. I thought it would be a good thing for me and I hate it! It’s an online school but I hate it! It’s hard for me to concentrate, it’s hard for me to learn this way. So i’m falling behind in my Health and History class. My parents are yelling at me, and all i’m trying to do is make them happy. But my threat is if i don’t make up my grades I have to go back to the hick school. I’m in a club volleyball team, and volleyball is becoming boring to me, I love it with all my heart but I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Is it normal if I feel blocked from the world’ Like a loser’ I’m always feel like sleeping…and I can never seem to concentrate on my homework, like right now I have to to 13 assignments. I want to just give up.
I just want to sleep and watch YouTube.